Shield yourself from negative people- One Minute with Jay

There are just some folks that if I see them coming down the hall, street, aisle, wherever, I will turn and walk in the opposite direction. I mean power walk right out of there. This is because you have to shield yourself from negative people.

People that are ALWAYS upset or complaining about something no matter how small, even after you try to make them realize the good in their situation…Yup…them. You cannot save them, if they do want to be saved.

You cannot force better on them or in some cases even have a rational conversation. This is unfortunate but it is so true.

Negative people will suck your energy, life, youth (or what’s left of it) and then move on to the next unsuspecting warm body like an adult mosquito in the middle of June. I avoid at all costs but if the person is someone that you cannot easily cut out of your life then there are some steps you can take to lessen the impact of the this persons’ energy.

  1. Get positive people around you through elimination

Now this seems easier said than done but engagement is everything. What you engage in will determine what type of people you have around you. Whenever Negative Nancy or Sad Sam comes moping your way engage them less. You can do this by not getting excited when they tell you today’s new horror story.

Once Sad Sam realizes that you aren’t as into the conversation as you used to be he will have to move on. This leaves room for more positive buddies to meet you.

I’ve done this multiple times to weed out the energy drainers in my own life. Simply put, if you have been stuck in the same problems from 1997 I may not be the right friend for you. Sorry, life is too short.

2. Understanding their point of view

I find that a negative person’s view on most things is either based on being afraid of the worst or being afraid of not being loved. If this is the case then maybe you can minimize the negativity by reminding the person that what they are experiencing is fear. Which is natural but allowing it to control or stop you is not.

If you can find a common ground or point of reference this may give you enough to help refocus the other person’s perspective (even if it’s only temporarily).


  1. Hey Jay,
    I can sure relate to your article about negative people.
    I’ll even admit that I used to be one of them but no longer.
    Negative people just bring you down and can ruin your day and your life.
    It’s so much better when you are positive and stay away from the negative ones.
    What’s your take on the best way to avoid these toxic people Jay?

    1. Hey Rob,

      I get it. There was a time where all I did was complain and be upset about my circumstances and it got me nowhere. So I had to change my approach and focus on what I was doing to improve myself.

      To avoid these toxic people I would not get involved with them in the first place. The minute you find that someone has a negative mindstate that affects you I would stop hanging around them. Because the change has to come from inside of them.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *